Straight To The Heart (Three Of A Kind #3) Read online

  He leaned over and kissed me on the forehead. “Okay, you go get yourself together while I run back to the office to pick up a few files that I forgot I need to have with me while I’m away.”

  “Okay, can you give me a clue where we’re going to so I can dress appropriately?”

  He ran his hand down the side of his face like he was deep in thought. “The Carlyle.”

  Damn it. Why couldn’t he ever just pick a casual chain restaurant? Now I’d have to put on a dress and some heels, not to mention do something more with my hair and make-up.

  “Will you be ready in about forty-five minutes?” he asked as he got up from the couch.

  “Piece of cake.” I smiled.

  He moved closer, placing his hand under my chin and tilting my head before bending down and placing his lips on mine. He always knew how to win me over. Just when I was raging mad at him, he’d sweep me off my feet and reel me back in. I walked him to the door and locked it behind him. Time to find my secret weapon: the little black dress buried in the back of my closet, the one I was hoping Jasper would remember me wearing for the next four days while he was gone and hopefully the one he would be taking off of me later tonight.

  ***

  After running into a business associate of Jasper’s as we were entering the restaurant, and Jasper being unable to say no when he invited us to have dinner with him and his wife, I was feeling completely out of place. The romantic evening that I’d conjured up in my head was slowly fading away with talks of land acquisitions, variances and other big words that were undefinable to me. I tried to hide my boredom as they talked non-stop about business and even thought about trying to strike up a conversation with the man’s uptight wife, who I believe Jasper introduced to me as Jane. I decided against it, remembering how she’d greeted me with barely a nod while checking me out from head to toe. Something told me she was on Team Kathy and I was in enemy territory.

  That was confirmed when she finally broke her silence to interrupt her husband and Jasper. “So, Jasper, Kathy told me you’re spending the holiday with her and the kids.” She looked at me and raised her eyebrow. I wanted to just get up and walk out. Jasper’s hand reached under the table and rested on my bare thigh, almost as if he knew what was going through my mind.

  “I’m spending the holiday with my kids, Kathy just happens to be coming.” He retorted, but I still wasn’t feeling any sort of satisfaction, I was still his stupid girlfriend that would stay behind while he played house with his family. I stared straight ahead, trying to fight the tears. He squeezed my hand tightly under the table and I yanked it away.

  “Excuse me, I have to use the ladies room.” I threw my napkin on the table, fighting with everything inside me to not cry. I wasn’t sure when I started becoming so emotional over everything. I usually held myself together, but clearly I’d reached my breaking point with the whole Jasper and not yet ex-wife situation.

  My stomach was churning and by the time I reached the bathroom, I could feel the burn of bile rising through my esophagus, making it to the toilet just in time to lose the unappetizing appetizer that Jasper forced me into trying. I felt like such a fool. Here I was, in an elegant restaurant, puking my guts up, wishing I could find an escape route. I waited for my stomach to calm down before readying myself to exit the stall but stopped when I heard women’s voices gossiping. “Did you see Jasper Campbell sitting at the next table over?” One of them asked.

  I stood with my ear against the stall door and peeked through the crack, watching the two of them as one applied lipstick and the other messed with her hair.

  “Yeah, I did. God, he is so fine! I can’t believe he’s getting a divorce, she’s gonna get half of everything.” Lipstick girl said.

  “Yeah, well don’t be so sure of that. That cute little blonde he’s with may just be a little play thing. Once he gets tired of her, he’ll realize that it’s cheaper to keep the wife.”

  “That’s true! Maybe he won’t even have to get rid of the blonde…..hell, I’d happily be a side dish for a man with his looks, power and money.” They both began to laugh loudly.

  “Yeah, she looks like a stupid young girl that he could easily manipulate.” Their voices began to fade as the door slammed behind them.

  I crept out of the stall and into the now empty bathroom. There was no doubt in my mind, I needed to leave the restaurant right this instant. I rinsed my mouth with water and patted my face with a wet paper towel. I looked at my pale reflection in the mirror and barely recognized the girl I’d become, the girl that would drop whatever she was doing for a guy, the girl that as of late, was doing more crying than smiling over him and the girl that was the laughingstock of everyone that remotely even knew Jasper. I took a deep breath and grabbed onto the ledge of the sink to fight off my dizziness, feeling a little weak after just puking up my guts.

  Once I pulled it together, I walked back into the restaurant, trying to find the old tough Gia somewhere deep inside. Jasper and his business associate stood up as I walked back over to the table and Jasper pulled out my chair. “I’m really not feeling well, so I’m just gonna head home,” I whispered to Jasper. He furrowed his eyebrows, clearly taken by surprise. “It was very nice meeting you,” I focused my attention more on the man than his wife as I hurriedly made my way out the door.

  The cool air hitting me in the face as I stepped outside was refreshing and welcoming. “Gia, where are you going?” Jasper demanded as he followed behind me.

  “I told you. Home.”

  “But…I thought.”

  “So did I, Jasper, but I guess I thought wrong. I don’t belong in your world.”

  He moved closer and pulled me into a hug. “Gia, is it because of what Lawrence’s wife said about me going away with Kathy?”

  I shook my head. “No….it’s me, Jasper. I don’t know who I am anymore other than the girl that’s standing between a man and his wife.”

  “Gia, that’s not true.” He looked away and shook his head before finally focusing his eyes back on mine. “I love you, Gia.”

  Everything and everyone around me seemed to freeze. Why? Why did he have to come out and say that now, just as I was finally finding the strength to walk away? His gaze was intense, and all I could do was cry. “Don’t say that…” I backed away as the tears surged from my eyes.

  “Why?” he whispered, grabbing on to my arm and pulling me closer. My tears were now turning into sobs. Not the reaction a normal person would have when the person they had been with for the past five months finally professed their love. But Jasper wasn’t like any other person. He was a very powerful businessman who was used to getting what he wanted, when he wanted it and at the moment he clearly wanted me. I was angry at myself for letting it get this far. I was angry at myself for falling into this trap. And most of all, I was angry at myself for wanting to say it back to a man for the first time ever, knowing that I would be one hundred percent genuine with my words, but never really knowing if his were real or just a tactic to keep me under his thumb.

  “I – I have to go. Have a really good Thanksgiving.” I stood on my tippy toes and brushed my lips against his cheek before heading down the street and hailing down a cab. I got into the back seat and managed to get my address out to the driver before burying my head in my hands and completely losing it.

  Sixteen

  Gia

  Thanksgiving Day had arrived and I tried to put on my best game face for my family, not wanting them to know that I was an emotional wreck on the inside, not to mention a physical wreck. I was beyond exhausted and my stomach was on edge for the past few days. I couldn’t believe that I was allowing a man to get me this way. I finally broke down and sent him a text after three missed calls, a voicemail and two texts from him, all asking me to please just talk to him. My response was short and to the point, basically telling him that I would talk to him when he got home. I wasn’t going to hash out our problems over the phone and certainly not while his family was right in the nex
t room.

  “You know that was the first time I’ve ever been to the parade. It was really fun, Gia. Thanks for the suggestion.” My mother smiled as we waited for our dinner.

  “Welcome.” I forced a smile back, crushing the lemon in my diet coke with the tip of my straw.

  “Hello…earth to Gia.” Carrie waved her hand in front of my face.

  “Oh, I’m sorry….what?” I snapped out of it, giving her my full attention.

  “You should have told Jasper to join us today so Mom and Ben could have finally met him.”

  My mother let out a disgruntled sigh and picked up the drink menu, pretending to study it. “Oh, he had to go away on business,” I replied.

  Carrie nodded and took a sip of her water. My mother used the moment of silence as an opportunity to completely change the subject. She began questioning me all about the upcoming ballet I was in and while I was pretty sure I’d told her all about it before, I gave her the details once again just to appease her.

  “Well, I want to be there on opening night.”

  “K…” I let out a deep sigh.

  Carrie excused herself to use the ladies room and Ben and Jason became engrossed in the football game that was playing on the giant television while my mind began to go to jello once again.

  “Gia, is everything okay?” My mother asked.

  “Oh, yeah….it’s fine.”

  I was glad when Carrie came back and we were able to talk about her pregnancy, instead of dwelling on my mess of a life. Being with my mom, Ben, Carrie and Jason did help to lift my spirits ever so slightly, but at the same time it made me realize I was alone. My mom had a great husband to go home with and so did my sister, and I would be going home to my little two by four apartment alone. And for the first time ever, it actually bothered me.

  After dinner, we walked around the city for a bit before calling it a night. Jason was on call, starting at midnight, so he had to get back and my mother was complaining that her feet hurt. So, there I was walking through the door of that tiny little apartment all alone. I tried to stay positive, reminding myself that I would be meeting up with my dad, Amber and Luke for lunch tomorrow. So I just had to get through the next eighteen hours of solitude. I turned on the TV and started the teakettle. I was almost afraid to see the text that had just come through, fearing that it was Jasper and in my momentary lapse of self-pity, I knew I’d be tempted to text him back. I was ecstatic to see that it was Cam instead:

  Cam: Happy Thanksgiving, my beautiful girl.

  Me: Same to you! But you’re on vacation, shouldn’t you be getting drunk and picking up actual beautiful girls instead of texting my lame old ass?

  I hit the send button and felt the first genuine smile of the day stretch across my face.

  Cam: I’m already drunk and why do I need to pick-up beautiful women when I can just text the most beautiful one there is?

  I let out a loud laugh.

  Me: Yup, you must be really drunk! Miss you! Hope you are having lots of fun and have another drink for me. Xo

  Why the hell did he have to live on the opposite side of the country? He was the only other person that I could commiserate with as we both seemed to have that same “wild” gene that Carrie seemed to be missing.

  Cam: Love you and miss you too, beautiful girl.

  Love you? I had told Cam countless times that I loved him in a brotherly sort of way. He would always respond with a Love ya back, but never a LOVE YOU, and he’d certainly never been the first to initiate it so he must have been wasted! I let out a loud giggle, looking at the text once again and breaking from my self-pity cocoon a little more. How lucky was I to have a friend like him?

  I flicked through channels and decided on a Lifetime movie before getting interrupted by the whistling on my kettle. I must have gotten up too quickly because all of a sudden it hit me, a wave of nausea, and the next thing I knew, my entire Thanksgiving Dinner was floating in my toilet. There was no way in hell I could afford to be getting sick. The ballet was starting in two weeks and I had double the rehearsals coming up. I stepped out of the bathroom and stared at the television in a daze at the pregnancy test commercial that was flashing across my TV screen. No. No. No. I ran to the calendar to look and see when I was due for my next birth control shot and my hands were shaking as I lifted the pages of the calendar. Two months ago. I had missed the appointment and totally forgotten to reschedule it with everything else going on. I stopped getting a period, which my doctor said was normal once I started taking the shots, so I couldn’t even go by that as a sign. I slid down to the floor, running my hand through my hair. No. This couldn’t be. My body was rundown from working, dancing and all the emotional stress I was putting on myself. I was sick. Not pregnant. I picked myself up and got back on the couch. I would make the appointment to get the shot first thing in the morning and everything would be fine. For now, I was going to stop needlessly worrying and try and get some much-needed sleep.

  ***

  “Where are Amber and Luke?” I asked my father when I saw him standing out in front of the restaurant alone.

  “Luke has strep throat so Amber’s home with him.”

  “Dad, we could have rescheduled.”

  “Nope. I had a date with my little girl and I wasn’t going to cancel.”

  “Well, thanks!” I smiled and hugged him tightly.

  We walked inside and were led to our table. As I looked over the menu, the bacon burger was calling my name, but I was afraid to chance it with the way my stomach had been acting up. I decided to throw caution to the wind at the last minute and ordered it when the waitress came to take our order.

  “So, what’s been going on?” My father asked.

  I shrugged. “Not much. Work. Dancing. Work.” I forced a smile.

  “How are things…..are you still seeing…?” My father was only slightly better than my mother about me dating Jasper. He wasn’t happy about it by any means, but at least he was able to accept it.

  “Umm….I’m not really sure.” His eyes widened. “It’s just a lot…you know?” He nodded. “He’s umm…got his kids, and they come first…not that they shouldn’t. But it’s just the whole idea of him being separated instead of officially divorced. I just….” I let out a slight laugh. “I just think maybe Mom was right about dating a man who wasn’t divorced. And if you ever repeat that to her, I will deny it!” We both began to laugh.

  “Well, Gia, you’ll get no arguments here.”

  “He really is a good guy, Dad.”

  “Yeah, well I only really know him on a business level and I know he can be pretty ruthless to get what he wants and I guess that’s why he’s a multi-millionaire. I guess I was afraid that he was that way in his personal matters too. I’m glad to hear that he’s not, at least where you’re concerned.”

  “No, he’s been nothing but a gentleman to me.” For the most part he was anyway.

  “Well….good.”

  The rest of our lunch was filled with stories of Luke and his latest antics. I couldn’t wait to see him again, judging by the picture that my father had shown me from yesterday, he’d grown quite a few inches.

  “So, do you have to get back?”

  “Yeah, unfortunately I do. Amber has to go see her grandmother in the hospital, so I have to get back to watch Luke.”

  “Okay.” I tried my best to disguise my disappointment.

  “I’m sorry, Gia. We’ll be back in a few weeks when everyone is feeling better. That reminds me, when does your show start?”

  “In two weeks.”

  “Well, I want front row seats.”

  “Done.” I smiled. I gave him a hug goodbye and got in the cab, wondering how I was going to kill the next four hours until I had to be at work. I should just go home and relax. Tomorrow was going to be a jam-packed day filled with nothing but rehearsals and dance. So rest would probably be the best idea to shake whatever sickness that I had going on. I had called my doctor’s office earlier in the morning and wasn
’t able to get an appointment until the end of next week for my shot. Until then, I wasn’t going to think about it- that was until we passed the Duane Reade a few blocks from my house.

  “Oh, can you let me off here?” I shouted to the cab driver. He pulled over and I jumped out after giving him his fare. As I stepped inside the store, I felt like all eyes were on me. I knew they weren’t, but since I was in here for something that I never imagined myself ever needing to purchase, I felt like I was doing something taboo. I was immediately brought back to the summer that I decided that I wanted Darren Banks to be my first before heading off to college. He was hot. I had crushed on him for a good part of my senior year and much to my surprise, he was still a virgin too. I will never forget the fiasco of going to get condoms. We drove four towns over to a pharmacy where no one would know who he was. He even went as far as to ask me if I would go in with him to get them. If I had based sex on the four minute experience of that first time with him, I wouldn’t be in the predicament that I was in right now….I would have probably become a nun. Lucky for me or maybe not so lucky, each time and each guy got better and better.

  I walked down the aisle and looked around before stopping at the home pregnancy tests. I grabbed the first one that I saw and headed to the register, paid for it and was on my way. Piece of cake for now.

  I walked the two short blocks to my apartment and was shaking by the time I went into the bathroom to do the deed. I scanned the directions and started the process. Why was it impossible to pee when you were nervous?

  Finally, I breathed a sigh of relief.

  I placed the test on my bathroom sink. “Two negative lines. Two negative lines. No positive.” Maybe if I begged, it would give me the results that I wanted. Clearly, all the pleading in the world wouldn’t work when the big positive symbol began to show in the second window of the test. It was all so surreal. This couldn’t be happening. I sat on the ledge of the toilet, inhaling and exhaling deeply. How could I have been so irresponsible to let this happen? What the hell was I going to do and how the hell was I going to break this news to Jasper?